max-logic

25 May 2010

Throwback Tuesday - Lies We Tell Ourselves

at 5/25/2010 07:33:00 am | | labels: random, throwback tuesdays

Welcome to Throwback Tuesday. Since Google Analytics tells me that most of you are new visitors, I thought I'd re-post all the good ish you missed before you got on board the max-logic train.

Men I called you out already. Ladies, please believe your turn is coming. But today's lies know no gender; because everyone blows smoke up their own ass at one time or another. Now I'm not saying you have to stop doing it, you just have to know you're full of shit.

1. It just happened

This is the balm with which we soothe ourselves when we do someone something we shouldn't have. We all like to believe that the universe has conspired against us in such a way as to render us completely blameless when we find ourselves in an undesirable situation, when the reality is that our actions have set us on the path that led to this dreaded event. The #1 use for this line is cheating - we all just love to say it just happened and it was an accident, when really we made it happen ourselves by choosing to be in a setting that was conducive to it.

Unless you're one of those mythical magical people who actually does slip and fall on a dick/in a pussy, you need to stop lying to yourself.

2. You can't help whom you fall in love with

Unless we are talking about love at first sight - which we are not - this is a load of bullshit. In order to fall in love with someone, you kinda need to know something about them, spend time with them, have some kinda physical contact with them, get a sense of your compatibility. Am I right? of course I am. So if you don't put yourself in a position in which it is possible for you to gain the kind of knowledge/connection that is required for you to fall in love, isn't it pretty much a guarantee you won't? And if you do spend time with someone and end up falling in love with them, haven't you facilitated that?

This expression never made sense to me - please enlighten me if I'm missing something.

3. I fell asleep

Oh this one just burns me! People use this one all the time! And guess what - nobody just falls asleep - you go to sleep. When you make plans to go out and you don't go because you fell asleep, you're a damn liar. Unless you have narcolepsy or fell asleep standing in front of your mirror with a mascara wand on your eyelashes, you're full of shit. You chose to lie down or sit down, you chose not to have some kind of safeguard to make sure you stayed awake or woke up when you had to, so guess what? You went to sleep. and you're an asshole.

Stop lying to yourselves people!

What do you guys think? Are these legitimate excuses or just shield we use to hide from blame?

Comments (10)

Logging you in...

Dashboard | Edit profile | Logout

Logged in as

0 Vote up Vote down

Johnny From LiveAGL · 815 weeks ago

I think this is the first time I've fully come to an agreement with you on everything....
I definitely agree with #1(I didn't know this was going to go down seriously, but it was at the back of my mind...lol)

1 reply · active 815 weeks ago

+1 Vote up Vote down

maxfab 81p · 815 weeks ago

johnny i cannot believe that you do not always 100% agree with everything i say. didn't you read the rules of this blog?

0 Vote up Vote down

@__melissa · 815 weeks ago

i esp. agree with #3. its along the same lines as "its was so last minute!" when you find out you weren't invited somewhere or to something. or does that only happen to me? ................... :(

1 reply · active less than 1 minute ago

+1 Vote up Vote down

maxfab 81p · 815 weeks ago

LOL that's another load of bullshit! i hate that one too.

0 Vote up Vote down

Geenote · 815 weeks ago

Max, I had to laugh a little because i am guilty of #3 just last night. And I know I hate driving in the rain if I don't have to so i wasn't going out but i said i fell asleep, which i did but...you know.

As for the rest, I agree 100%!!!

0 Vote up Vote down

Anna N. · 776 weeks ago

#1 is a definite. That's some ho shyt. #2...eh, I think that you can help who you have extended contact with, but you never know who is going to kindle that spark. Sometimes the person you want to have that connection with, you never do. Sometimes a person may be outside of your norm but you still find yourself drawn to that person. Then you spend more time with them and the attraction builds. That being said, the only folks I ever hear say this are with someone that they shouldn't be with, like their sister's man. This statement is usually preceded by #1. #Snapped.

#3? Well....my azz will fall asleep. Quickly. I try to tell my friends that if they want to do something after work I have to go directly from work. If I have to go home and there is lag time, ya girl will fall asleep. Or go to sleep. I'm old. Sue me.

1 reply · active 776 weeks ago

+1 Vote up Vote down

maxfab 81p · 776 weeks ago

Girl I'm old too and I fall asleep on people all the time - I'm constantly telling people that Friday night flexes don't work in your 30's. But before I lie down in my bed or on my couch I send a text and say "it's a wrap". I don't just leave people hanging and then come with that lame "oh I fell asleep". That's what grinds my gears!

0 Vote up Vote down

Nick_L_Odeon · 776 weeks ago

lol...
i hear you on #1.. some girls be callin me with that.. and i'm like, well.. unless he came round and kidnapped you.. "was it duppy drivin the car over to his house at 1 in the morning?!" idiot ting dat!! i'm like, "just give it to me straight.. you're wasting too much oxygen tryin to not make yoself sound bad.." it's me, i won't judge.. i been there...

#3.. is C.L.A.S.S.I.C.!! ever since MTV came out ('81) i've been cursed with not getting enough sleep.. people KNOW that "if Nick sits still too long, then she's DONE!" i've fallen asleep in the car on the way to parties.. fallen asleep AT parties (by the speakers).. but it's all good.. i try to stand by my word.. so if i tell you that i'm going, then barring acts of nature, i'm going.. and yes, this means that i'm setting the alarm clock to wake up on time...
me and my goin out gal don't do this.. NO PHONE CALL!?!?! that's a no-go... that gets you knocked down the "i'll call her next time" totem pole..

0 Vote up Vote down

the 1st lady · 776 weeks ago

new to the blog, thanks for the fun thus far..looking forward to adding max-logic to my day.

i'll go backwards:
3 - is annyoing because at the end of the day, if you REALLY wanted to go - you would have napped earlier or not at all. if you were tired, you should have said so and i would have invited someone else. now, if you were supposed to be at my house and 9 and you roll up at 11. dont be surprised if im in pjs. AND well vexed.

2. i think this one applies to ms. alicia-soon-to-be-beatz and the like. in an ideal world, you dont fall for/find attractive the dude that has a wife/girlfriend/criminal record/di*k smaller than a crayola crayon - but some do. the problem is FALLING IN LOVE part. too many people mistake lust/attraction for love. too many people dont know what it truly is if it had sent them a tweet msg or tattooed it on. we now live in this IM/twit/fb/bbm/iphone world where everything is instant and shorterm, with no thoughts to tomorrow, the day, week, months after. much less years and decades.

0 Vote up Vote down

the 1st lady · 776 weeks ago

1. while sex cannot happen accidently, the intent to have it can take you by surprise. im not naive or a rookie in the ways of the world, but have been in a situation where one thing leads to another and while your brain is saying you should stop at this moment, (my minds telling me noooo...but my body, my body is tellin me yesssss...) you choose not to for a myriad of reasons (beyond the obvious physical ones). Girls tend to say this because of the backlash we suffer when we own our sexuality. even though we're grown, i gotta play coy, cute and virginal even though my hormones are racing and rude dot com just aint doin nothing for me anymore? and if i do sex you up (#nocmb), i'm the one that's a hoe? im not supposed to have sex with anyone i dont love first, and im not supposed to fall in love with someone i have sex with...um.. ok. when y'all are done figuring out what we should and shouldnt do or say, we'll just keep on using this bold faced lie.