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6 July 2010

Throwback Tuesday - The Just Before Girl

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The just before girl kinda has a bad rep.  Nine times out of ten she is (or is portrayed as) the one who lied, cheated, took advantage, stole, stalked, hurt, betrayed, or cheated on your guy. She's the reason he doesn't want to commit/is in a selfish phase/won't open up/can't trust anyone.

Yeah.  The just before girl can really fuck shit up for you.

But sometimes the just before girl is a blessing in disguise. Sometimes the just before girl is your guardian angel and you don't even know it. She's the one who endured the games, the fuckwittage, the fear of commitment, the push and pull, the switcheroo, and the unrelationship for a little or a long time; steadfastly staying the course, unwaveringly understanding;  showing your guy that he can count on her.  Or someone.

Unfortunately for the just before girl (but fortunately for you), shit never works out between her and your guy. It can't - that's just the nature of the just before.  But when it ends - sometimes more amicably than others - your guy emerges with a different perspective. On some level he realizes he was a dickhead and mindfucked the just before girl six ways from Sunday.  He emerges - like a butterfly from a cocoon - slightly less of an asshole than he was before.

This is where you come in. Your guy won't be perfect (they never are) but at least he'll be able to admit he's been a jerk in the past. Your road with him won't be completely smooth, but at least you'll have a destination in sight.

See I'm that just before girl. Looking back over my illustrious career as a serial dally-er;  I'm noticing that almost all the men I've dallied with have gone on to wife (literally or figuratively) their next girl.
 

This makes me strangely proud. 

Like a mother hen who has raised her chicks and sent them off to lay their own eggs;  I'm grooming boyfriends, fiances, and husbands on my little farm.  I'm like a finishing school for flawed men.   I'm like the last inspector in a factory who makes sure the product is in salable condition before it hits the shelves. Just call me Inspector #9

What do you guys think? Do you think the person that preceded you has any impact on your man/woman's behaviour? Are you the just-before girl/guy?


Comments (10)

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I say this about myself all the time!
The serious ones announce weddings or cohabitation with kids... the not so serious ones call me up just as they're about to start something serious with the next girl to apologize for being assholes to me.

Or, in true HLBB style, they call to ask me advice.

I'm actually bored of the "just before" status...I'm not as evolved at you and I'm still get annoyed (read: bitter) when the next girl reaps the benefits of my work...
1 reply · active 757 weeks ago
It actually surprises me that I'm not more salty about this. But really I think it's because I am all tooo aware that not one of my exes (with the exception of the first love) had what it takes to be Mr. Max.

I look at these wifeys and I think - better you than me. I'll pray for you girl.
see, and I absolutely abhor grooming a man for someone else. but thats just me! LOL
1 reply · active 757 weeks ago
Hahahaha I can understand that. But as I said above, these dudes aren't ready for me anyway.
Your Dane Cook. LOL
2 replies · active 757 weeks ago
I apparently spell like Dane Cook. I meant you're Dane Cook. Clearly.
I don't know about Dane Cook. I will google him and then come back to this.
LOL at this. Good one Max.

Its funny, Exes would say that about me, but I would say "you just showed me what I DIDN'T want in a woman" so I guess they can help!
1 reply · active 757 weeks ago
Streetzie is the just before man....I never would have thought.
kudos. i guess you should give yourself props i guess.

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