No Too $hort

If there's one thing I've learned from writing this blog, it's this: no matter how nasty you think a sex act is, at least one of your friends is doing it. Now usually in this scenario, I'm the nasty one doing the nasty thing; but every once in a while someone trumps me. Case in point - the Golden Shower. 

When I was kicking around ideas for this week's edition of Nasty Fridays, I kept rejecting the idea of writing about golden showers because I have only one thing to say about it - ew. But I was feeling kind of bad for being so narrow-minded so I decided to take it to my twitter people in the form of a poll. I didn't get a lot of responses (apparently people are a little uncomfortable talking publicly about peeing during sex) but all of the responses I got were along the lines of "that's nasty" and "who does that?".

Then I decided to take it to my real-life people, thinking I'd get more of the same. And for the most part I did, until my most conservative, least-nasty friend told me that she makes it a point to pee on everyone she gets involved with. I was flummoxed, to say the least. I had to know more.

After a prolonged discussion (taking place while I was on the streetcar getting the side-eye from just about everybody), it came down to this: peeing on someone is the ultimate form of closeness. And if you can do everything else, why can't you do that?

I hate to admit it, but it's kind of a good point. If during sex we can take one another's body parts into our mouths (or bums), can ingest bodily fluids, can toss salads or go head-to-head with Auntie Flo, what's a little pee pee between buddies? Is it really that nasty? If being able to pee in front of your significant other is a sign of closeness, isn't copping a squat on them the utmost in bonding experiences? Besides, urine is sterile right?

Or maybe it's a power thing. Nothing says "I dominate you" more than releasing a hot stream of stinky piss on your lover, does it? Especially if said lover is lying there with a look of ecstatic anticipation waiting for the rainfall to come. If someone is going to take that from you, there's no need to be insecure in your relationship ever again, is there?

I don't know about you guys, but I'm still not sold. I think the bedroom and bathroom are separate rooms for a reason. They weren't meant to be mixed. But what say you, dear readers? Is there a place for pee pee in the bedroom? Enlighten me.

And p.s. there's a "favourite commenter" prize for the first person who can tell me why I called this post "No Too $hort". CHeeKz I'm looking at you.

Happy Friday everyone!