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29 March 2010

PSA for Ladies - The Toilet Seat is not that Deep

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I've been meaning to rant on this for a minute and now the time has come. Ladies I'm talking to you today and I have only one question: what is it with you and the toilet seat? No - seriously....what is it?

I lived with a man for I don't know how many years and he never once put the toilet seat down when he was finished with it. Never. And do you know how many times I accidentally fell in the toilet? Never. Because I checked before sitting down. Don't you all do that?

And really - how did down become the default position for toilet seats anyway? Let's really examine this. As far as I can see, the toilet has 5 main purposes:

1. For a lady to pee in
2. For a man to pee in
3. For a lady or man to poop in
4. For vomiting
5. For cleaning

Hmm...so out of 5 possible uses, 3 require the seat to be up. And yet you're still complaining? I don't get it.

The way I see it, complaining about the toilet seat is a little like the boy who cried wolf. You know what I mean? It's like you waste so much time complaining about something so frivolous that when you have legitimate beef the man is already tired of hearing your mouth. You're destroying your own credibility because you don't want to take a half a second to look down at the seat before you sit in it. Does that make any sense?

Ladies - any of you out there agree with me or is this further evidence that I am really a man?

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bag lady. digital nerd. beauty junkie. shoe whore. i'm a sucker for big words and box-fresh kicks. know a little bit about a lot of things and have something to say about everything.
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